IMO, Instagram sleuthing is an art form. Few people are more valuable than a professional IG investigator, and every friend group needs one. Insta stalkers can keep tabs on your exes, figure out who’s dating who, and — most importantly — tell you everything you need to know about your new crush. Need to know whether your cute coworker broke up with their SO? Want to figure out whether that hottie you matched with on Tinder is actually single? For the zodiac signs who Instagram-stalk crushes better than anyone, finding out someone’s relationship status is child’s play. Give them your crush’s name and 30 minutes, and they’ll find out whatever it is you need to know.
People with a passion for social media sleuthing tend to share a few key qualities: They’re curious, they’re resourceful, and they’re just a little bit sneaky. While an Aries likely has zero interest in perusing a crush’s IG posts from 2014, other signs always jump at the opportunity to do digital detective work. If you want to find out not only whether your crush is single, but where they grew up, what they majored in, and what they order at Starbucks, then you’ll want to talk to these social media-savvy zodiac signs.
Gemini (May 21—June 20)
Geminis are endlessly curious, and as social butteries, they want to know anything and everything about the people around them. Those born under this energetic and wildly intelligent sign are always looking for new ways to keep themselves stimulated, and for them, figuring out the hobbies, friends, and food preferences of a crush feels like a fun game. Let’s not forget that Geminis are also major gossips, so nothing thrills them more than getting the scoop, especially on someone they’re interesting in dating. Think you can hide something from a Gemini? Think again.
Virgo (Aug. 23—Sept. 22)
You might not think of Virgos as IG creepers, but these conscientious individuals tend to leave no stone unturned. Like Gemini, Virgo is ruled by Mercury, which means that those born under Virgo are similarly sharp, shrewd, and speedy. As meticulous perfectionists, Virgos take everything they do seriously, so if their task is to learn more about a crush, you better believe they’re going to do it right. The best part: Virgos love to help people, so if a friend needs IG intel, a Virgo will always take on the job.
Scorpio (Oct. 23—Nov. 21)
Some people may call Scorpios creepy. I like to think of them as well-prepared. Scorpios pride themselves on knowing everything about everyone else and revealing nothing about themselves, so social media creeping is their jam. After someone catches their eye, as they want to glean as much info about that person as they possibly can, which means taking a really deep dive into their IG. Do they need to know who their crush’s sister went to prom with five years ago? No. But that won’t stop them from finding out.
Capricorn (Dec. 22—Jan. 19)
Like Virgos, Capricorns don’t do anything halfway. If a Capricorn is interested in someone, they’ll want to do their research, and they’ll make sure their investigation is thorough AF. The more information a Cap knows about a person, the more powerful they feel, so they’re not satisfied with the basics. Plus, there are few things Caps enjoy more than puzzles. For them, figuring out a crush’s entire romantic history is the equivalent of a scavenger hunt, and they love any exercise that lets them put their methodical minds to use.
Hey, @CIA — if you’re looking for new recruits, I recommend hitting up people born under these four zodiac signs.
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